i'm not exist...
Heart to Heart
Assalamualaikum...
Neither me nor anyone in this world chooses to be sad. Whatever the reasons, there's no turning back. The only way to survive is crying. My heart doesn't lie. It's not blind. Just tell me the truth. i'm sick and tired of pretending. I can't take it anymore. i don't deserve this.....maybe.
I'm waiting for another chance, to make everyone happy. I'm waiting for happiness and it's just another disappointments come. yes, i deserve this. i'm not a mysterious girl with a bundle of secrets. i'm human too. maybe you forget that i have heart too.
i feel alone and empty. so lonely. a bestfriend? no. i have nobody here. i am in a class full of friends and i feel as though i am by myself. i want to cry. i wish to express what i fell deep inside my heart but......nobody cares. nevermind.
i let my pain fade away. i keep the blades out of sight. nobody could hear my cries at night. nobody could see the pain i was feeling. i designed my mask to hide the lies and designed my mask to laugh....
Behind all the smiles were the tears. Everything you think you see, it's fake. It's not me. i'm still searching, searching for the thing that will stop my crying, searching for someone who will erase my fears, searching for someone who will wipe my tears.
Behind all the smiles were the tears. Everything you think you see, it's fake. It's not me. i'm still searching, searching for the thing that will stop my crying, searching for someone who will erase my fears, searching for someone who will wipe my tears.
how long can i fight? :'(
Oh God, please give me more strength. i just need a bestfriend, who will listens to all my stories and who will feel incomplete without me. day by day, i'm slowly dying. i couldn't go on. i wish one day i can smile, the real smile.
Kenangan Ramadhan
kemain fake aku edit, haha.
Ramadhan dah makin hampir. Alhamdulillah, dapat jumpa lagi dengan Ramadhan tahun ni :)
otak blank tetiba bila nak cerita pasal puasa ni. mungkin puasa kat U ni tak seronok macam waktu kecik kecik dulu. teringat kenangan waktu Ramadhan dulu....
- dulu time kekecik, excited sangat nak pegi tarawih sebab nak jumpa kawan dengan kekasih hati kat surau. kikikikiki. biasa la time kekecik dulu, sembahyang pon 8 rakaat je. lepastu main kejar kejar au cak au cak dengan kengkawan. dah habis 23 rakaat, tunggu makanan free then mengaji. hmm teringat anas aka pujaan hati aku waktu tu. hahahahaha k.
- kena kurung luar rumah sebab balik lambat waktu nak berbuka. hmm. hahaha. malas nak cerita dah.
- dulu penah duduk rumah arwah mak lang kat pahang waktu puasa. sahur je mesti arwah buatkan telur separuh masak letak kicap. Ya Allah, favourite aku waktu kekecik dulu. bila pak lang marah aku sebab aku percikkan air basuh tangan kat baju dia, arwah yang pujuk aku bila aku nangis lepas kena marah tu. hmmm rindunya kat arwah.
- Ramadhan tahun tahun sebelum ni meriah sangat kat kampung. pasang langsir sesame, cat dinding, buat kuih siput, pasang pelita. yang paling best bila gotong royong nak masak rendang. semua tu dah tak rasa lagi. mak cik dah meninggal. tak rasa lagi dah kuih siput :'( Al-Fatihah
banyak sangat kenangan Ramadhan yang tak boleh aku lupakan. seronok yang teramat waktu kecik kecik dulu. kalaulah sekarang boleh rasa lagi semua tu kan? hmm. apa pun, aku harap Ramadhan kali ni lebih baik dari Ramadhan tahun sebelum ni. in Shaa Allah.
SELAMAT MENYAMBUT RAMADHAN AL-MUBARAK
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